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That is why I laugh at myself and shatter my secret in jest。
I make light of my pain; afraid you should do so。
I long to tell you the truest words I have to say to you; but I dare not; being afraid that you would not believe them。
That is why I disguise them in untruth; saying the contrary of what I mean。
I make my pain appear absurd; afraid that you should do so。
I long to use the most precious words I have for you; but I dare not; fearing I should not be paid with like value。
That is why I gave you hard names and boast of my callous strength。
I hurt you; for fear you should never know any pain。
I long to sit silent by you; but I dare not lest my heart e out at my lips。
That is why I prattle and chatter lightly and hide my heart behind words。
I rudely handle my pain; for fear you should do so。
I long to go away from your side; but I dare not; for fear my cowardice should bee known to you。
That is why I hold my head high and carelessly e into your presence。
Constant thrusts from your eyes keep my pain fresh for ever。
园丁集 第十一章(1)
The Gardener 42
O mad; superbly drunk;
If you kick open your doors and play the fool in public;
If you empty your bag in a night; and snap your fingers at prudence;
If you walk in curious paths and play with useless things; Reck not rhyme or reason;
If unfurling your sails before the storm you snap the rudder in two;
Then I will follow you; rade; and be drunken and go to the dogs。
I have wasted my days and nights in the pany of steady wise neighbours。
Much knowing has turned my hair grey; and much watching has made my sight dim。
For years I have gathered and heaped up scraps and fragments of things;
Crush them and dance upon them; and scatter them all to the winds。
For I know this the height of wisdom to be drunken and go to the dogs。
Let all crooked scruples vanish; let me hopelessly lose my way。
Let a gust of wild giddiness e and sweep me away from my anchors。
The world is peopled with worthies; and workers; useful and clever。
There are men who are easily first; and men who e decently after。
Let them be happy and prosper; and let me be foolishly futile。
For I know this the end of all works to be drunken and go to the dogs。
I swear to surrender this moment all claims to the ranks of the decent。
I let go my pride of learning and judgment of right and of wrong。
I’ll shatter memory’s vessel; scattering the last drop of tears。
With the foam of the berry…red wine I will bathe and brighten my laughter。
The badge of the civil and staid I’ll tear into shreds for the nonce。
I’ll take the holy vow to be worthless; to be drunken and go to the dogs。
The Gardener 43
(HP)祭司 惊艳一枪 微星纪元 锦衣行 天才宝宝绝色娘亲 精灵现在式(全+免费) 掠夺天下 骑鱼历险记 妻愿得偿 唐朝公务员 骄阳 我是大空 赢汶河传奇 伪妆记 宠物魔术师 无限之量子永生 极品男人 送你一匹马(完结) [家教]who am I 新宋第二册·十字
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