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第44部分（第1页）

office　in　Sidewinder。　She　had　no　particular　need　to　see　further。　The　present

crisis　was　more　than　enough　to　keep　her　occupied。

She　crooned　to　Danny；　rocking　him　on　her　breasts。　Her　fingers；　on　his

shoulder；　had　noticed　that　his　T…shirt　was　damp；　but　they　had　not　bothered

reporting　the　information　to　her　brain　in　more　than　a　cursory　way。　If　it　had

been　reported；　she　might　have　remembered　that　Jacks　hands；　as　he　had　hugged　her

in　the　office　and　sobbed　against　her　neck；　bad　been　dry。　It　might　have　given　her

pause。　But　her　mind　was　still　on　other　things。　The　decision　had　to　be　made　—　to

approach　Jack　or　not？

Actually　it　was　not　much　of　a　decision。　There　was　nothing　she　could　do　alone；

not　even　carry　Danny　down　to　the　office　and　call　for　help　on　the　CB　radio。　He

had　suffered　a　great　shock。　He　ought　to　be　taken　out　quickly　before　any

permanent　damage　could　be　done。　She　refused　to　let　herself　believe　that

permanent　damage　might　already　have　been　done。

And　still　she　agonized　over　it；　looking　for　another　alternative。　She　did　not

want　to　put　Danny　back　within　Jacks　reach。　She　was　aware　now　that　she　had　made

one　bad　decision　when　she　had　gone　against　her　feelings　（and　Dannys）　and

allowed　the　snow　to　close　them　in　。。。　for　Jacks　sake。　Another　bad　decision

when　she　had　shelved　the　idea　of　divorce。　Now　she　was　nearly　paralyzed　by　the

idea　that　she　might　be　making　another　mistake；　one　she　would　regret　every　minute

of　every　day　of　the　rest　of　her　life。

There　was　not　a　gun　in　the　place。　There　were　knives　hanging　from　the

magnetized　runners　in　the　kitchen；　but　Jack　was　between　her　and　them。

In　her　striving　to　make　the　right　decision；　to　find　the　alternative；　the

bitter　irony　of　her　thoughts　did　not　occur：　an　hour　ago　she　had　been　asleep；

firmly　convinced　that　things　were　all　right　and　soon　would　be　even　better。　Now

she　was　considering　the　possibility　of　using　a　butcher　knife　on　her　husband　if

he　tried　to　interfere　with　her　and　her　son。

At　last　she　stood　up　with　Danny　in　her　arms；　her　legs　trembling。　There　was　no

other　way。　She　would　have　to　assume　that　Jack　awake　was　Jack　sane；　and　that　he

would　help　her　get　Danny　down　to　Sidewinder　and　Dr。　Edmonds。　And　if　Jack　tried

to　do　anything　but　help；　God　help　him。

She　went　to　the　door　and　unlocked　it。　Shifting　Danny　up　to　her　shoulder；　she

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